I kid you not . . . this week the European Parliament held a live-streamed Rap Battle between MEPs (assisted by actual rappers) in a desperate attempt to look cool to the younger electorate.
You can watch the whole thing from the bottom of the page, or in a new tab HERE – trust me, in parts it is toe-curlingly painful and in other parts it is side-splittingly funny (unintentionally). I sat through the whole 1hr 45m (more-or-less) so I can point you to some of the highlights.
The format was that the four main Groups in the EP would do battle in two semi-finals and a final.
The first semi was between the EPP (Euro Conservatives) and The Greens. The best rap line of the night for me, went to Dekay the MC for the EPP (17m 50s),
“We need solutions, no disputin’, we need a fiscal Union” – yeah boyeee. Sorry, I got a bit carried away there.
The next worrying bit of text, from Mos Prob the Green MC (30m 20s) where he endorses “No Countries but Communities”. In the end, despite the EPP MC being far better at rapping, with tighter lyrics and some excellent rhymes the Green Party went through.
The funniest moment of the night (at 34m 40s) was when someone from the Young European Federalists came on to announce the second topic and asked the crowd if they were all ready to vote against the Euro sceptics – the silence was deafening.
The second semi saw the ALDE (Liberals) take on S&D (Socialists). This battle was most notable for the excellent delivery of LeeN the ALDE MC and the bizarre performance of Mils the Socialist MC who failed to to make any political points at all in the three one-minute rounds. Indeed at 44m 0s he even admits that he’s not into politics and doesn’t know anything about the issues.
The other highlight of this battle was the fabulous Dad Dancing by Jorgo for ALDE from about 48m – too funny. But the ALDE won to set up a Green vs Liberal final – who would have thought it.
The final kicked off after a break with someone from the European Youth Forum “rapping” the final topic – cringe at 1h 14m 0s.
There then flashed up some statistics about youth unemployment (55% in Greece), followed by another three rounds of bank bashing and general nonsense. Once again the final was lit up by the Dancing Jorgo at 1h 21m 45s and 1h 25m 20s.
Finally at around 1hr 29m 30s the ALDE were declared the winners.
The whole thing was streamed live via MTV Voice – prompting the host at half-time to encourage people to come closer to the stage as it was looking a bit sparse.
So what did the young people think of the evening? Well the BBC reporter that was there only got one response from the attendees – that they’d only turned up for the free booze.